One of the big things people who are new to discipling ask is, “What do I DO/SAY when I meet with someone to disciple them?”
Ultimately, it can be a lot of different things and you should spend more time with them then just when you are specifically meeting to disciple. However, it is really useful to go in armed with good questions. The reason we emphasize questions instead of statements is that we are wanting to see what is going on inside their lives so we can provide the correct thing to help them grow.
Think about when you went to see your doctor the last time. The doctor didn’t just walk in and say, “Take one z-pack and you’ll feel fine.”
No, what he/she did was start by asking questions. They were diagnosing you so they could provide the right treatment.
When we ask questions we are diagnosing the person we are discipling. We are trying to see what is going on inside him/her so that we can provide the thing he/she needs to grow. Often this might be a Bible passage, or an obedience item, encouragement, or just more time together.
I think in the ideal discipleship time you would spend some time asking them questions, praying, and looking at the scripture together.
Here are 7 questions I got from a man who did a lot of cross-cultural disciple making overseas.
- How have you been lately?
- How is your family?
- Have you had any difficulties lately?
- How has God been working in your life?
- How is your relationship with the Father?
- What is God teaching you through His Word?
- How is your prayer life?
Then you might ask other specific questions based on what you know is going on with the disciple. As you can see these 7 basic questions cover almost everything in a disciple’s life.
Once you have asked the questions spend some time praying together. Remember we can’t do anything without God (John 15:5b). Then you might go through a Bible passage or other curriculum together. (In my opinion, just going through a curriculum without other life questions is less likely to grow someone into a disciple and a disciple maker.)
Are there other questions you like to ask?